Expectations: The act or state of looking forward or anticipating
We all have expectations of almost everything in life...our jobs, our children, our family, our friends and lovers, our cars. What happens when these hopes are not met? Is it fair to place our assumption that someone or something is going to act in a given way, and then be disappointed if our imagined predictions don't come true. I understand that some situations are obvious, if I behave or speak in a certain way then its pretty safe to assume I am going to get an almost inevitable result. If I don't change the oil in my car, EVER, then it's more then likely I can expect to have problems. These expectations or beliefs are almost factual in their beginnings, and not my main focus.
The dilemma for most I believe, are the expectations we place on others to meet our emotional and personal needs, which we feel we are deserving of, or owed to us, almost as a direct measure of our worth. When these unspoken promises are not fulfilled, we may feel disheartened and less valued. Also upsetting is when we are questioning or even convinced someone has special feelings for us, and we place our anticipations based on what we think they will say, or choose to do in a specific situation, hopefully reinforcing our assumptions, and when they don't cooperate.....we wonder, what does that mean?
How about when our perceived entitlements are ALMOST but not quite met, forcing us to choose whether we are completely satisfied, or LOWERING our hopes even further so that it appears we've actually received our desired outcome.
I find this to be a confusing circle of getting nowhere real fast. Why do we do this to ourselves? Not only believing, but embracing our 'Delusions of Grandeur,' thinking we are able to surmise just how a person should think or act. Its almost like we create an imaginary Theater in our heads with a cast of characters who don't even know their parts, and We as the Directors and sole Editors, are dismayed at the lack of good help these days.
How about when our perceived entitlements are ALMOST but not quite met, forcing us to choose whether we are completely satisfied, or LOWERING our hopes even further so that it appears we've actually received our desired outcome.
I find this to be a confusing circle of getting nowhere real fast. Why do we do this to ourselves? Not only believing, but embracing our 'Delusions of Grandeur,' thinking we are able to surmise just how a person should think or act. Its almost like we create an imaginary Theater in our heads with a cast of characters who don't even know their parts, and We as the Directors and sole Editors, are dismayed at the lack of good help these days.
Personally, I would much rather not concern myself with what someone is going to say or do for me, and then be pleasantly surprised at what comes my way. I choose to live by the code of:
"I will follow my heart and live without expectations, this way, whatever shared between two people is freely given without expectation of something in return."
Living without creating limits on others is so much more fun, eliminates disappointments, and places the exclusive responsibility for our happiness on ourselves, exactly where it truly belongs.
"I will follow my heart and live without expectations, this way, whatever shared between two people is freely given without expectation of something in return."
Living without creating limits on others is so much more fun, eliminates disappointments, and places the exclusive responsibility for our happiness on ourselves, exactly where it truly belongs.
Learning to give up our expected outcomes is the gift that keeps on giving, and allows the opportunity for unimaginable beauty and joy to come our way. Now, when something wonderful and unexpected happens you can accept it for what it is, a treasure freely bestowed, without ever having to rehearse a single line, or even worse having to call for a rewriting of the entire script.
